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Finding the Holy faggot atheist within

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I love planets. Actually, I love exoplanets — anything about them. I want to know everything I can. How massive/dense they are, what materials they are comprised of, what type of star(s) they circle, if they have sister planets, if they have moons, if they are moons. Anything about them that is confirmed and known by the astrometry community, I bet I know or will know within a relatively short amount of time.

A friend of mine calls me an exophile. Though it is meant to be a derogatory term for my obsession, it’s still accurate. I do not have a degree in any type of physics and I am not a part of any astronomic group, but my information is legit. Over the past fifteen years I have spent my free time searching for new things to read on planetary information, and over the past twelve years, I’ve taken my research to the internet.

exoplanet1

Often at times, especially since a space telescope called Kepler launched, I  have allowed my obsession to consume me hours a day. For not having a formal background in astro/cosmo studies, I know a fair amount about the universe, its growth, and the decay of matter within it. And as an atheist — a homosexual one at that — it brings me great joy that I STARTED questioning myself, my environment and other individuals because I recognized the ignorance of a single religious zealot separating himself from the possibility of there being more than what he knew.

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I was raised ‘Christian’ or, rather, to be christ-like. My family didn’t stick to any one denomination and went to many churches during my rearing. Due to my own circumstances as a child, I was surrounded by poor health and extreme personal wealth. I went to the best schools my state had to offer. My parents spared no expense for the best medical care for me during my adolescence, during which time I was struggling with a myriad of health problems. Even though I went to a good school it was still a religious one.

I remember in great detail a conversation I had with a pastor at the school, I had initially wanted to have a conversation with him about why I had so many health problems — why would god do harm to a child? But after hearing his sermon during chapel about Man being the crown jewel of god’s achievement, I wanted to know how and why aliens fit into his vision.

He dismissed them entirely and then wanted to talk about me being sick, trying desperately to get back to the speech he had prepared for me, given my teacher told him I was curious to have a one-on-one discussion. I grew bored of what he was saying. The only thing I really remember after that point was him distinctly saying earth was special, and that life couldn’t be elsewhere because we didn’t even know of any other planets besides the then nine planets of our solar system…and at the time the only interest I had in space was what I saw in fiction, that is until I saw him try with such difficulty to change the subject back to his typical talking points.

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Soon after, I realized medical doctors had the answers that my pastor didn’t.

That’s when I fell into science. My mind developed in a way in which it understood I could get answers, but also I sought further questions. My parents tried to provide spiritual guidance — my mother helped me emotionally but she had fewer answers than what I was able to answer myself. The guidance that they tried to give me through others was just as much of a failure. Not to say my parents failed, however they themselves are just cogs in the machine from which the real problems originated. I wanted to know why I was sick. Why is there sickness at all? And why should Christ’s terrible death by crucifixion amount to us being magically cured of all our ‘sins’?

Being already disappointed with religion’s/conservatives’ lack of interest in and protection of nature, I sought out people that questioned the world. Smart, eccentric people. These great minds that I hardly knew gave me the strength to speak my mind, to question even what they taught me, and to gaze into the unknown. I was hooked on science from then on.

I remember looking into the mirror at a young age not long after that conversation, and seeing the universe in myself. Even though I lacked the language to explain it, I knew then that I was a natural intellect among many. I had the power to decipher the mysteries and the questions we have about the world. Even if some of them remain unknown to me, that does not make them supernatural. Science doesn’t preclude the unknown from existing but rather shows that with time and dedication one has the ability to work out a theory, test that theory, and understand the reality they live within. I think that was when I started to identify that there was no god, even before my discovery of my own sexuality. It was when I saw that the things my pastor believed in had no proof. It was a story he was addicted to because of religious conditioning…

Granted, being a faggot helped pull my beliefs together — it made me an outcast, showing me that religion was not only wrong about what it teaches about creation but also general existence and self-rule. I found my sanity/atheism in the fact that religion has no real interest in the workings of actual existence or creation. Once I was free from it I saw (not necessarily in its followers but in the dogma) that it is only interested in control through a false truth/law. After all, anything that claims infallibility, especially without facts, is doomed for failure.

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I believe now that I am christ-like, but I know that Christ was not the son of god. God does not exist. I am a good person who was raised with fair values and a good education. I acknowledge that religion mitigated this. My values are based on what nature and intelligence requires for growth (truth at all costs, death to false truths and the passing of this information to others) which is why I consider myself and many other atheists to be holy. We are not overseen by god, but are able to peer within the depths of creation and understand how it works.

Because of technology, this generation of humans is being enlightened unlike any other generation before us. Not only do large portions of us have the ability to study, but we also have the ability to share without ridicule what we are studying and what we theorize to be true. Historically, a good education was limited to the wealthiest 1% of our species. These individuals were generally monarchs and dictators. This fact faded as monarchistic countries lost their power. Compulsory education has expanded to about 20% of the world’s population (and complexity within different scientific fields has flourished) and even though there is still a long way to go and many failures within the system we have, we are on the right track.

Statistically, atheists make up the most educated as well as the least criminal portions of our population. This contradicts another lesson I was taught in school: that atheists were practically satan worshipers. After all, according to th Christian bible ‘people that are godless have no morality or code-of-ethic.’ Granted, most of us that question rules have no desire for propriety (as modern homosexual culture shows) but that doesn’t mean we are lawless.

In fact I think those that do not worry about an all-knowing, everlasting, omnipotent being who punishes those for their actions have a larger sense of ethic than most christians since an atheist’s mind is in control of the actions it commits and has a more realistic grasp of the consequences. Our ability to discount things that do not make sense is one of our greatest strengths as atheists. The problem I now face with religion is that those who are free from it and especially those of the homosexual community are not that different than the problems I started out with originally when it comes to religion.

I ask religion itself: how is it you can have meaning without facts to back it up? To religious homosexuals I ask: how can you follow an idea in which you see fault? And, most importantly, to my fellow atheists I ask: how can you stand by and not preach truth in equal measure? Why do we atheists have so few leaders standing up for our case? Why do we hide in this modern society? This is when we need shepherds showing the flock that we need not hide anymore. This is our time, and it’s a sensitive time for us to take control of our world.

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The culture wars that most of the faithful preach about can be won simply by doing what they do. The masses must be taught. The only difference, and the difference that makes us winners, is that we have facts to back us up. Even with a much lower population percentage we can win huge strides by showing people how to think rather than telling them what to think. Unlike religion, our way of thinking encourages individuals to develop their own perspective through curiosity, discovery, and above all else, testing limits.

Personal responsibility is the conservative argument these days, and on an ideological level I agree with it. If you have more responsible people you will need less laws and government… Unfortunately, conservatives do not see that society can create responsibility by creating better people through education that exposes high percentages of its entire populations to the basics of the scientific method.

I understand some of this plight. In my early twenties I felt that there was no purpose in doing anything since there was no meaning. I saw everything as just part of a machine and that I, a cog, mattered very little. But after spending the last year of my life traveling over some of the poorest regions on the planet, which also happen to be some of the most religious, I have to wonder: why aren’t atheists doing a better job? Religion in a dogmatic form has ruled over our species probably just as long as we have had written language. So why haven’t those who understand its power and application stood up and changed the world yet?

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Its been almost two decades since I went to that private school in Arkansas, and in those two decades most of the questions I had at that age have been answered. We know that the chemical processes that create life are not uncommon and can be artificially mimicked in a lab. We know that almost all i/ii population/third generation stars develop planets around them when they first form, and that some keep their planets in stable orbits for their entire lifetime. We know that the universe is far greater than the distance we can even see which is on a scale that no human being can ever conceivably know what goes on within.

Before modern science, religions maintained that earth was one land mass, alone in one ocean. Then, when scientists found the Earth to be round, dominant religions suggested that it was the center of the universe with the sun going around it. Then they altered their stance when it became irrefutable that the Earth in fact orbits the sun, saying that the sun is the center of the universe. If these things are wrong, why are we still suggesting that man is made in god’s image? Why are we special? Why not live in a world where anything is possible and ultimately provable as existing or not? Why are there so many followers of god when there is absolutely no evidence for his existence?

Why do even religious figures profess things that can be proven to be incorrect when we can correctly demonstrate through the scientific method that their ideologies are only opinion and have no foundation in reality. Not only have exoplanets been found but also we can quantify an average statistic of how often they form with stable orbits, and we can identify what type of stars they orbit. We know for a fact that planetary bodies outnumber stars by multiples (not to mention rogue planets, which are even higher in numbers). So why does one exclude the possibility for life on other planets when statistically it has to be out there? As stated before, science, after all, does not preclude the unknown from existing. It merely demands that we question and explore before accepting anything. Why do we think we are special? Religion requires submission, but also an ego.

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I understand why I became an atheist. I had many obstacles in my own life (one being my health, the other my sexuality) that caused me to question my stance on religion. Also, because of my exposure to science, I found reason to doubt. Why don’t atheists, or even liberals in general, make education the top focus of social policies? If people in general had more information, would they not be more capable of committing to better/healthier actions/options? Surely there are more children that only need their own interest to be sparked in order for them to understand what it has taken me a lifetime to learn. Why aren’t there more like me? Am I the only holy atheist seeking information as a salvation from this mess?

http://exep.jpl.nasa.gov/atlas/atlas_index.cfm
http://kepler.nasa.gov/

The post Finding the Holy faggot atheist within appeared first on gaywithoutgod.com.


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